I don't know about you, but I really like to have something to look forward to. So I was really happy this week, when the Mums told me they had booked a holiday cottage in Wales for us all (well not KC...) to go to in September. Mums have been to Wales a few times, but I've never been. The last time they went, they took Flynn with them.
Perfect Uncle Flynn, of course,
only ignored Mum 75% of the time had better recall than me so could be let off his lead. Ironically he didn't much care for beaches. Mum says she hopes we might be able to find a safe quiet beach where I can have a run too. But I digress...
There are stereotyped images associated with every nation, and although these are exaggerated images there is sometimes a modicum of truth in them. The French wear berets and cycle around with strings of onions around their neck, Australians are all blond surfers who only ever cook on barbecues. And then there is the English. Now they of course, with their imperialist past, feel there is absolutely no need to speak a language other than their own. They are all born with the certain knowledge that if they SHOUT LOUD ENOUGH IN ENGLISH everyone in the world can understand them.
Now my Mums really try quite hard not to conform to this stereotype. There are a lot of tourist destinations close to where we live and they are always mightily impressed by the number of French/German/Japanese people who stop them and ask for directions in perfect English. So if they visit somewhere where English isn't the first language, they try to have at least one or two useful words up their sleeves. Pretty much everyone in Wales can speak English, but around 22% do use Welsh. The percentage is higher in North Wales, where we are going. So I thought I'd share with you the highly useful words and phrases that Mums have picked up over the years.
Araf - slow. Other Mum finds this particularly useful to yell at Mum as she zooms along Welsh narrow country lanes.
Popty Ping - this is colloquial Welsh for a microwave oven. Good isn't it?!
Bwrdd Smwddio ( board smoothyo)-Ironing board. Can't imagine why either of them know that.
Moron - carrot. It is important to make sure everyone knows you are speaking Welsh with this one, otherwise you are likely to get punched.
Asgwrn Grefi (assgoorun grayvee) Gravy Bone - now that's more like it!
Moch Glust (mokeh glurst) Pigs Ear. - Well that's me just about sorted I think.....
Milgi - greyhound. As in "that's a very handsome Milgi you have there"
Wisgi - whisky. Wonder which one of them learnt that.....?
Mwy o wisgi - more whisky. Now I know which one of them it was....
Fodca 'da leim - vodka and lime. God they are so predictable.......
Un beint or cwru (ian baint or coo roo) - one pint of beer. Fine but what about the crisps to go with it?
Creision (crayshon) crisps. Oh well done Mum!
If any of you out there are fluent Welsh speakers and would like to let me know more useful phrases, I'd be terribly grateful. "My dog would like a pint of lager and a bag of Wotsits please" would be really handy for Mums to learn before we go... hehe!